A doctor in America has just invented a 'sperm sorting machine'. At least that's what he claimed when his receptionist burst into the office to find him doing something peculiar with the Hoover attachment. Apparently the system used for separating the male and female sperm is remarkably simple. A sample is placed in the petri dish with a microscopic pile of household items on a tiny staircase. All the sperm that go straight past without picking anything up are obviously boys. John O'Farrell's first collection of columns GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT was a huge success prompting fulsome praise from such major public figures as the Queen Mother, Roy Jenkins and Cardinal Hume. Sadly, since their deaths, their glowing endorsements cannot be officially verified. So here instead is another collection of funny, satirical essays on a hundred and one 21st century subjects. Read how the government plans to introduce 'Santa loans' that will leave school children £10,000 in debt for all the presents that used to be free from Father Christmas. Learn how the EU is being expanded to include Narnia. And did you know that American war planes now have a little sticker on the back saying 'How's my bombing?' with an 0800 number to call if they blow up any Muslim country in a discourteous of aggressive manner . . .
John O'Farrell is the author of seven books. His first book, Things Can Only Get Better, was a number one bestseller and was dramatized for BBC Radio 4. The Best a Man Can Get was the bestselling debut novel of 2002. As well as being a bestselling author, John O'Farrell is a regular contributor to television and radio. For the past five years he has written a weekly humorous column for the Guardian, three collections of which have been published as Global Village Idiot, I Blame the Scapegoats and I Have a Bream.